I know, it's not a laughing matter. Big storms are scary. But sometimes, even when I'm waiting for the snowstorm to knock out my electricity for a week, warnings like DO NOT BURN CHARCOAL INDOORS FOR COOKING OR TO KEEP WARM just make me smile. You shouldn't burn charcoal indoors. But is it NOAA's job to tell us that? And if I'm burning charcoal indoors for light, is that ok, as long as I'm not warm or eating anything?
I was reading up on Eduoard's impending arrival where my brother and family live, and caught this line of the current warning. After reassurances that evacuations are not being called for, even in Galveston, the next line is
ABANDONED VEHICLES ON HARRIS COUNTY TOLL ROADS WILL BE TOWED.
So, abandoned vehicles elsewhere are just fine. My brother abandoned his car during the last downpouring tropical storm several years ago, but thankfully, it was on highway 59 and he did not get towed away. Can you imagine being the tow truck operator? To hell with that, it's dumping 10 inches of rain and you want me out there towing cars?
I haven't been collecting them long, but here's a few others I like:
CONDITIONS WILL DETERIORATE RAPIDLY...SO SLOW DOWN AND ALLOW EXTRA
TIME WHEN TRAVELING. PRACTICE WINTER SAFETY RULES...KEEP AN EXTRA
FLASHLIGHT...FOOD...AND WATER IN YOUR CAR IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY.
It's the...ellipses...that are my...favorite. Like Forecaster Matthews was thinking, hmm, what else should they have in their cars? Food...umm...
THE SEVERE WEATHER WILL BE OCCURRING AT NIGHT WHEN MANY PEOPLE WILL BE ASLEEP.
Except for my kids. And the neighbors' kids. And the dog. And me with my kids. Might as well have an impromptu block party, frankly.
LIGHTNING IS ONE OF NATURES NUMBER ONE KILLERS. REMEMBER...IF YOU CAN HEAR THUNDER...YOU ARE CLOSE ENOUGH TO BE STRUCK BY LIGHTNING.